Wednesday, August 24, 2011

The First Tears of First Grade

Today was traumatic-for Cavett and for me.  It was the first day of first grade tears. 

When I picked Cavett up from school today, I was on the phone with my sister (who I haven't talked to in a while) and wasn't able to talk immediately, but he was very quiet and respectful.  As soon as we got home, he burst into tears saying that several kids were making fun of his shirt, saying that he had "dirt on his shirt."  It broke my heart to see him cry and talk about how hurt he was.  Why do kids have to be mean and where do they learn it?

We made these family shirts during our last week of summer as a fun family activity.  We took black (or hot pink in my case) T-shirts, and ironed on an "h" for Hill with freezer paper.  Then we took them outside and used a spray bottle of bleach to make a negative print and some pretty cool designs.  The kids shirts turned out really awesome as did mine.  Stephen's "h" bled a little and there is only a hint of and "h" but it's still cool. 

So, the boys wore the shirts today and Cavett was very proud of his.  Too bad he "will never wear it to school again."

We spoke through the tears and I consoled as best as I could telling him that he didn't ever have to wear it to school again and that this was called being "bullied."  We talked about different ways to address the situation-telling the teacher, saying "so." and leaving it at that, and also turning it back on the kid and showering him with kindness saying things like, "your shirt is really cool, I like it!"

"Do not judge others, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn others, or it will all come back against you. Forgive others, and you will be forgiven."  Luke 6:37

After Karate when we had more time to discuss we pulled out the Bible.  It was important that he knew God's take on the matter of forgiveness even if the other person doesn't know they did wrong or hurt someone.  God is pretty clear on the matter.  I have been in too many friendships where I have been hurt for me to not hammer this one home. 

"Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others."  Colossions 3:13

"But if you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive your sins."  Matthew 6:15

"Instead be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you."  Ephesians 4:32

"But when you are praying, first forgive anyone you are holding a grudge against, so that your Father in heaven will forgive your sins too."  Mark 11:25

We talked out the big words and he understood that he makes mistakes too and that God forgives him, and in return he must forgive others.  It's a hard thing to do, forgiveness.  It's a humbling thing, but a character trait absolutely worth working toward. 

Tomorrow is a new day with a forgiving heart, loving others.  Hopefully, no tears. 

"Most important of all, continue to show deep love for each other, for love covers a multitude of sins."  I Peter 4:8


Allison@Slice of Heaven said...

Oh, Jennifer, this breaks my heart! We have had our share of tears, too, with Max being bullied for his size and it is sooooo tough! What beautiful lessons you have shared with him to help him understand and get through it. I admire so much of what you do for your kids! God bless you and him and I hope tomorrow is better. He will definitely be on my prayer list tonight!

Candace said...

Oh so sad. So sad. Sweet Cavett. Tell him we love his cool shirt and we love him. Excellent life lesson. love y'all.